This is my child. Up until recently I have only been aware of this child being a “lump” in my wifes stomach…now it has a face and the reality of that is quite impressive.
What I often forget about birth is that it is my own birth. Quite literally this child is my own mind starting a story that is similar but profoundly different than the one I am currently experiencing as its father. It is emerging from a state of utter unity into the world of duality, possible perceived limitations, and experience.
This consciousness, which so recently built a brand new body, is going to go through the same lessons that we all go through. It’s going to learn about a reality that is separate from itself…it’s going to learn how its body works…its even going to learn what taste, touch, and sound are. It’s going to be quite a shock.
The really interesting part of this experience is that I am aware of being both sides of the experience here. I am aware of being the Father as well as being the child. I often talk about how our own consciousness is always there for us, acting as different characters throughout our life in order to help us along…but this is where I’m truly experiencing that reality. To this child I am simply an extension of itself…I am a part of its reality that is supposed to help it along as it gets used to living in Duality. Every thought, insight, or impulse that I have is literally connected to what this “childs” mind is creating for its own good.
I think we often limit our children by assuming that just because they don’t speak they do not understand. To a consciousness that is learning the concept of being separate from the things around it I would think that it understands a great deal. Perhaps more than we are willing to admit. Our children hear our justifications, our escapes, and even our self-deceptions. They learn from our own lack of responsibility from the moment they come into this world….just as your own mind knows when you are lying to yourself, your child does as well.
I think that this is the biggest part of what I have been facing within myself lately. So often I come across “parenting” tips from people who truly believe the best way to raise a child is to Train it, To control it, and bombard it with a belief system. I have been wondering if I would do the same thing…am I so insecure in my own sense of self that I must condition a newly emerging consciousness to agree with me before it can make its own choice about what to believe? Is it right for me to stomp out any chance this child might have to explore perceptions and beliefs that I myself was too afraid to explore? I think not.
I think the one thing I must have faith in is what I have had faith in all along….myself. This child is nothing more than another reflection of my own mind and because of that I must realize that it has the ability to choose, it has the ability to see, and it has access to infinite perceptions. This child is not something to be trained, it is something to be communicated with. It is something to be learned from rather than simply taught. As a consciousness this child will learn regardless of whether or not I boost my own self-image by deeming myself to be a “teacher”. In making myself out to be a “teacher” I am doing nothing more than being an example of self-righteousness and ego. I am not this childs teacher, I am an extension of this childs reality.
I am often amazed at my own life and how many choices have been made since its beginning. I look back at my path through perception and see an infinite amount of choices I could have made and even the points where I chose to pass those choices off to whoever was willing to make them for me. I know there are realities where the observer (me) has different choices and less chances to pass them off. There are realities where I am not immediately faced with the belief that I am separate from everything else…It amazes me to see this child being born into one of them. It is comforting to see myself being Reborn again.
Forgetfulgods Journal 